Manifestations of Pride


This is a list of ways pride is manifested, taken from Chris Moles’s book, The Heart of Domestic Abuse: Gospel Solutions for Men Who Use Control and Violence in the Home (50-54). Some of the points are paraphrased in my words. The numbering does not match the book’s.

1. Anger. because my rights or expectations are not being met.

2. Better than thou. The proud person sees themself as better and smarter than others. A constantly critical spirit reveals this attitude.

3. Talking too much. Proud people talk a lot because they think what they have to say is more important than what anyone else has to say.

4. Seeking Independence or Control. Proud people don’t like submitting to authority; they have to be in charge. They have to have it their way. They don’t like accountability; they won’t be told what to do. 

5. Unteachable. Proud people know it all. Their opinions are always right. They don’t understand because they won’t understand. 

6. Hurtful. Proud people are unkind to others. They belittle others to control or build themselves up. Very often hurtful words are guised as jesting. 

7. Lack of service. Proud people don’t serve others unless they will get recognition for their service. 

8. Lack of compassion. Proud people are self-centered; they are rarely concerned about others. Self-serving motives are usually behind the occasions a proud persons shows concern for another. 

9. Unable to admit you are wrong. A proud person always has an excuse. 

10. Blame-shifting. If the proud person is caught in a wrong, they are quick to shift the blame to someone else: “I’m sorry, but you shouldn’t have said or done that.”

11. Voicing opinions when not asked. A proud person can’t keep their views to themselves. Conversations quickly turn into opportunities for the prideful to express their opinions. These expressions usually involve putting others down.

12. Minimizing your own sin. Proud people make much of the faults of others and little of their own. Other people are always the problem. 

13. Using others. Proud people view others in terms of what those people can do for them. Everything is for them and about them. 

14. Deceitful. Some proud people will do or say just about anything in order for others not to find out negative things about them. 

15.  Using attention-getting tactics. Proud people employ various methods for getting attention. Complaining, grumbling, always talking about their problems, outbursts of anger, sulking, self-pity, bizarre behavior, etc. 

16. Not having close relationships. Proud people don’t experience real intimacy or friendship. They are either too self-sufficient to invest in another or they just use people.